Married? Now what? Everyone needs to work at marriage. We may have watched people drive but we still needed to study, practice and pass a test to get a license and be a great driver. We’ve watched marriages our whole life but we still need to learn how to “do marriage”- even if we got that license without a test.
- Do What the Other Wants. This works beautifully when you both do it. And here’s the trick, neither should expect anything from the other… otherwise, you’re just about you and not we.
- Don’t Tell All. Sharing is good to a limit. Your every doubt of the other and pointing out of every flaw will get you no where. And as for other info… a little mystery can go a long way.
- Your Spouse Doesn’t Make You Whole. Romantically and spiritually you may be two halves of a puzzle come together but your spouse can’t fix your insecurities or weaknesses. It’s up to you to make sure your half of the puzzle is in good shape.
- Grow With Each Other. A major reason a marriage breaks up: people grow apart. Pay heed: learn together; go on adventures; inspire each other as individuals.
Be in it… Forever. This marriage thing can’t work if you think you have an out. It’s not easy. It has ups and downs. To make it great, you have to be committed to the journey. Then… you’ll work hard to make it a great journey. (yes… abuse is a different story)
- Be Careful Who’s Advice You Heed. Speak to those who are wise and those who have succeeded not failed at marriage. Speak to those who disagree with you and challenge you tosee another perspective.
- Hang with Others in a Happy Marriage. You become the company you keep. Even if it’s family, limit your time and what you share if their marriages are not the ones you’d like to have.
- Enjoy. Life is fleeting. Next time, when faced with what you don’t like… laugh it out.
- Just Get Physical…unless you want to be siblings. Besides, the hormones released create a bond and help you overlook what you don’t find pleasing.
- Embrace the Similarities. Respect the Differences! Easy said but not done. Keep posted and we’ll cover this later.