And… How Are You With Things?

Here’s the way to have a proper relationship with the “its” of your life. How do you stack up to this to-do list?

  1. Have Some Things. No need to have all things. No need to have nothing,
  2. Limit Your Things. The more things we have. The more complicated our life becomes. Once you find that your things take up your time rather than free up your time… that’s when you’ve crossed the line. Read More

Family: Enjoy Them- Even If You Don’t Like Them!

Family creates the foundation for who we are. We can never fully deny them because they make us who we are- whether through birth or love. So, what’s the best way to handle family we may not actually want to be around?

  1. Family is Foundation. Each of us is built by our family- genetic and not genetically related. We are both physical and spiritual beings. So the better we understand where we come from, the better we know ourselves and where we want to go.
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“No Labor, However Humble, is Dishonoring.”

We all have to work.  Let’s make it good. How?

  1. Respect. Respect for authority is the basis of how society operates. So, if you are working for someone else, whether you like it or not, you are not authority… so give it up to the boss. Now, if you are the boss, don’t take your power for granted. Authority through respect will take you much further than authority through power.
  2. Do Your Best Work. You’re here to work. Whether you like where you are at this time or not, it is where you are. So, do your best. You will never regret it. Read More

In-Laws. Enough Said…

If you get married, you’ll have in-laws.  Every culture and country around the world has those jokes of the crazy in-laws.  But who wants a crazy, drama filled life?  In-laws are the foundation of the new expanded family you are now a part of.  So, here are some tips to an easy, happy life with the in-laws… believe it or not! P.S.  It’s never too late to create that family that you want.

  1. Direct Link to Who You Love. You can see this two ways. If you’re a son or daughter in-law… remember the one you love is a product of the family they came from- can’t deny them. If you’re a mom, dad, brother or sister in-law… remember the new family member is loved by your flesh and blood. Can’t deny them.
  2. Watch that Criticism. Once again, this cuts both ways. Put down your in-laws, you’ve put down your loved one. Either it’s your loved one’s family or their new chosen family. So, choose your words carefully. Read More

Raising Children- Basics We Can’t Do Without

We are flooded with what we need to do as parents for our children: give them activities, have a sense of humor, feed them well, make sure they sleep enough and have great friends, etc.   All true. But what are the basics that we truly can’t do without?

  1. They are Not a Mini-Me. Children are not you and will never be you. They are not here to be better versions of you. They are not here to do what you did not do. Children are here to live their own best life.
  2. Don’t Get Involved in a Power Struggle. Never demand something from your children that you know you can’t follow through without a power struggle. Fighting with children brings us down to their level rather than keeping us elevated as an authority figure.
  3. Give Them Space. Our entire purpose in raising children is to let them go. And every day you need to find ways to let them go a bit more. You are successful as a parent when your  Read More

Don’t be A Helicopter Parent to an Allergic Child

You’ve been to the doctor. Your child has allergies. Your doctor says your child could die from an allergic reaction. I’ve been there.

As a parent you our job is to protect our child from harm.   And so, we go into action making sure that not even a crumb of an allergen is near our child. We make sure that everyone has an epi-pen and knows how to use it. Food will not touch our child’s lips without an ingredient check. The schools, our community and all society will be taught all proper safety procedures for our allergic child.

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Toxic Folk

So… you do your best to have healthy relationships but some people just aren’t on the same page as you are. How do you handle the toxic folk who just don’t know how to do relationships right?

  1. They are Wrong. It’s easy, when with someone who is toxic, to begin to doubt yourself and over time see what you do as wrong. Read this repeatedly if you need to: YOU ARE RIGHT.
  2. Give the Toxic the Benefit of Doubt. This will definitely be hard when someone often has a hidden agenda or is ready to pounce at every move; but still, with each interaction, give them the benefit. This will give you peace of mind and give them a chance to change if they ever want it.
  3. A Person Can Be Helped Only if They Want It. You can only lead a horse to water, you can’t make it drink. If your toxic spouse, friend, parent, sibling doesn’t want to change, face it… they won’t.
  4. Keep Your Distance. Toxicity spreads. You will begin to think and act like those around you. So, keep your distance as much as possible. Emotionally and physically, if possible. Read More


Married? Now what? Everyone needs to work at marriage. We may have watched people drive but we still needed to study, practice and pass a test to get a license and be a great driver. We’ve watched marriages our whole life but we still need to learn how to “do marriage”- even if we got that license without a test.

  1. Do What the Other Wants. This works beautifully when you both do it. And here’s the trick, neither should expect anything from the other… otherwise, you’re just about you and not we.
  2. Don’t Tell All. Sharing is good to a limit. Your every doubt of the other and pointing out of every flaw will get you no where. And as for other info… a little mystery can go a long way.
  3. Your Spouse Doesn’t Make You Whole. Romantically and spiritually you may be two halves of a puzzle come together but your spouse can’t fix your insecurities or weaknesses. It’s up to you to make sure your half of the puzzle is in good shape. Read More

Strangers… What to Do With Them

It’s said that how a person treats strangers is a true mark of character. There is no obvious benefit or harm with a stranger, as you feel effectively anonymous. Here’s a step by step to stranger interaction that we can all use.

  1. Notice Them. Look up. We all have our eyes on our phones, our ears plugged and our minds not here. Let’s disconnect with our self-made world everywhere we go, at least for a few moments, to notice the world that is around us.
  2. Trust Your Gut. Did you know that we can smell danger? We actually can smell when someone’s happy, disgusted or sad! And all this happens subconsciously. (I know amazing! goggle it!)  So, trust your gut.
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How to Deal with an Ex: Top Ten Tips

In the quest for Mr. or Ms. Right… it’s inevitable that we end up with ex’s. A healthy outlook on our ex is key to moving on. Top Ten Tips. What do you think?

  1. Civility Goes a Long Way. Whether you are tied to an ex with children or the ex was a passing “thing”, treating others with civility is key. Give an ex at least the same respect you’d give a stranger. The past is over and your present actions are what others see. Your present actions build your future.
  2. Accept Your Mistakes. It takes two to tango. Never forget that. Even if you were a victim to a bully, you put yourself in that situation. Take responsibility for your part, so that you can change and not repeat the same mistakes. Read More