Enough with oversensitivity. I recently read an article about what not to say to a pregnant or new mom. The quick recap of the list is below.
First, let’s discuss oversensitivity for a minute.
(1) Oversensitivity is a way of asserting control over the behavior of those around you. An overly sensitive person will not see themselves as controlling because an overly sensitive person may truly be equally sensitive to others. But the bottom line is that everyone has to walk around egg shells when there is an overly sensitive person in the room.
(2) Oversensitivity creates excuses to be offended. Think for a moment why you want this. Is it because it gives you something to talk about? Is it because you think the world is out to get you? Something else?
(3) Oversensitivity focuses us on the negative in people. If we choose to look at the positive in someone else’s words, we will find that many times people are just trying to be helpful and… that doesn’t mean that we are incapable on our own. Assume words that others say come from a place of caring, lack of knowledge or from a person who is just not as sensitive as you. No need for offense- take words in the vain they were meant to be said – not in how you want to take it. That is ultimately what communication is about- understanding others.
(4) If you are still oversensitive… enough with your emotions. We live in a time when the focus of all actions is in how we feel. But ultimately, it is how we act which defines our character. If we let our emotions control us, we are out of balance and we will act in ways that will ultimately undermine us.
Here’s a quick recap of the list of truly ordinary comments, that people have said forever to each other around the world, which is today deemed as offensive:
- How far along are you?
- You don’t even look pregnant!
- Wow, your’e about to pop!
- How many babies do you have in there?
- Wow, you’re huge.
- You’re so tiny!
- You must be having a girl because girls steal beauty…
- You can always try again (for another sex)
- I was just sick.
- Did you hear about so-and-so’s crazy birth?
- Should you be eating that?
- I LOVED being pregnant!
- You better sleep now…
- Enjoy your relationship while you can…
- How many kids are you going to have?
- When are you going to have another?
- Don’t worry, the weight will come off!
- I hope he gets blue eyes.
- Don’t worry they get cuter.
- She looks nothing like you.
- He’s huge! Look at those rolls.
- Have you heard about (insert disease) outbreak?
- Just wait until he starts crawling!
- Your boobs are huge!
- Maybe you should try…
(Full Article: What NOT to Say to a Pregnant or New Mom)